You may recall me mentioning that I have a new hospice family. One of her favorite things is to be read to. She absolutely loves suspense novels and even has a favorite author.
My first meeting with her was this past weekend. Prior to going I prepared my heart, as I usually do, and had conversations with God. It went something like this, “God I am going to wait to buy a book by her favorite author until the second visit and then I will start reading to her from that visit on.” I can’t speak for God, but I can only imagine He was probably giggling to Himself as the words escaped out of my mouth.
You see, what most people don’t know about me is that I am very dyslexic and not a strong reader, especially when called on to read out loud. And called to read out loud in public, I usually go into a brief state of panic. I can become sweaty, flushed, my heart is racing, I have a deer in the headlights look about me, you know, the works! Sometimes I may mispronounce words, I may skip over words getting too far head of myself, I may leave words out that are critical to the comprehension of the sentence. Just about anything can happen when I am called to read upon in public. A lot of times I have to start the sentence completely over for it to make any sense whatsoever. In a group, there is no avoiding my weakness. So, with all that said, I find it very funny, peculiar- if you will- that God wants me to read out loud.
When I was a child I would write from right to left, completely backwards. You could hold my paper in the mirror and read it perfectly. Going to school was a struggle at best! I was finally “formally” diagnosed dyslexic at the end of my junior year in high school. By then it was really too late.
I met with my new friend and read three chapters. I struggled a bit and had to re-read a sentence or two or three, ok, you get the point. The rest of the day God marinated on my heart all the lessons within this one exercise of faith and obedience. He has used this opportunity, through my weakness, to not only bless her because of her weakness, but also to strengthen me through my weakness. Then a flood of names came to mind of who God used in similar scenarios. I am sure some will be familiar to you, so here it goes…
- Abraham was old (Genesis 17:1; 24:1)
- Sarah was impatient (Genesis 16)
- Noah got drunk (Genesis 25–27)
- Moses stammered and stuttered (Exodus 4:10)
- Miriam was a gossiper (Numbers 12:1–2)
- Jacob was a cheater (Genesis 25–27)
- Jonah ran away (Jonah 1:3)
- David had an affair (2 Samuel 11–12)
- Elijah was moody—one minute bold and courageous and the next fearful and on the run (1 Kings 18–19)
- Peter had a temper (John 18:10)
- Paul was a persecutor (Acts 8:3; 9:1-2)
- Martha was a worrier (Luke 10:40–41)
- Thomas doubted (John 20:24–26)
- Zacchaeus was short (Luke 19:3)
- and Lazarus was dead (John 11:14–44)
God had a purpose for each of these people. He chose them. He qualified them in spite of their weaknesses. He called them, just as he is calling you and me—to go and do in His name; and when He calls us, the name He calls us by is the one He used in the very beginning—good (Genesis 1:26–28; 2:20–23).
Sometimes God simply asks, “Would you be willing?”
Is there something that is pressing on your heart that you believe God is asking you to do? Are you possibly paralyzed with fear with just the thought of doing it? Are there one-thousand reasons and one-thousand excuses as to why you are not fit, qualified or equipped for the task?
- It may not be easy.
- It may not feel comfortable or good.
- It may feel painfully vulnerable.
- It may be awkward.
- It may feel foolish.
Now with all that said, I pose the question to you, “Would you be willing?”